Give your best marriage/dating advice.

I have only been married for 2.5 years, but spending a lot of time with the youth and college group from church, my wife and I get asked for marriage/dating advice a lot.

I always ask young couples, have you fought much? If you can fight with the other person, think they are the biggest moron in the world, and still want to be with them, then the relationship has hope.

My other piece of advice is to reconcile. No matter how small the spat, it is always important to reconcile with the other person and not assume that everything is all good.

What's your best marriage/dating advice?

 

don't overly compromise your own wants and needs, PERIOD!

 

This always sounds odd when I first say it to people, but try and follow, don't judge the "surface" reaction.

If you just want to date around and aren't looking for any kind of stability or commitment, you don't need advice. However, if you are looking to "settle down":

When choosing a mate, go for the person who on first impression, seems "boring". If you're at a party and there's a hot girl/guy who is the life of the party and the center of attention--run far, far away. This person may seem exciting and interesting and the type of person you'd like to be with, but you'd be wrong (typically). This person usually thrives on drama and conflict and always needs to be stimulated in some way, shape or form. You don't want to have to spend your life with this person.

The person who seems "boring" is usually intelligent and comfortable and confident enough with themselves to know they don't need attention and drama to get through life. This person is (typically) very stable and intelligent and doesn't need things to be "all about them". This is the type of person that (typically) makes a good mate.

My first wife was beautiful and exciting and the life of the party. At 20 years old, I thought "Oh my God I've got to have her!!" Well, I did and what followed was 4 of the worst years of my life. She was a drama queen and very conceited and not the type of person you want to have to live with.

My wife now, is beautiful, quiet and intelligent and the polar opposite of a drama queen. If compared to my first wife, at first glance my current wife would appear to be the "boring" one.

It's hard to explain in text over the internet. I hope I've explained it enough here for you to get what I'm saying.:beer:

 

Don't compromise. It's a sham. It doesn't work. Both parties are dissatisfied.

Relationships, especially marriage, is about sacrifice. 100% on both parts with each person is going out of their way to do what's best for the other.

 

I sum my marriage up like this-

Happy wife, happy life.

Seems to work for me... most of the time.

 

When I say get me a drink, don't finish doing what you are doing and then get my drink, get off your lazy ass and get it right then.

 

Been married 34 years....soooooo

KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid)

HAPPY WIFE = HAPPY HUSBAND

Nuff said...

OMR

Are you married???

OMR

 

You've found the express lane to divorce...

 

It’s better to ask for forgiveness then it is to ask for permission.
Honey, can I buy that new Turner? or Hey babe, check out this new Turner!!
use at your own risk.

 

Damn, you stole my thunder! Great minds think alike! :clap: :lol:

 

Just kidding above. I am 27 and I've been married for six years (almost seven). I can't think of a way to write how our relationship works in a post so I came up with a line.

The only thing I can think of is to remember that marriage is supposed to last until death. That sounds obvious but I don't think that most people make day to day decisions that actually reflect that. People give up waaaay too easy. So once you say "I Do", thats it, no quitting. (And no cheating!)


I hope I don't eat these words some day, I do not think I will.

 

my wife is my best friend...we share everything...talk about the weirdest off the wall thing and not be afraid to share it with one another. We've made a pact that we would never go to bed angry and it's worked so far.

 

Respect. We set the fighting rules from the start, no insults, no F* bombs. I see couples calling each other the most horrible things when they fight. We had a few fights in 10 years together, but never insulted each other. You can disagree on what the other says/do but it is still your partner.

P.S. don't go for forgiveness, just say that you need it because it is safer. Safety is expensive and oh so sweet....

 

I'll tell you what my dad told me on my wedding day.

"Love is blind, but marriage is an eye-opener."

So true.

 

My fiance's my counter-balance, so we keep each other in check. Justin also nailed one of the biggest points. My fiance and I both like to hit the trails, hit the beach, even hit the mall every once in a while. We just like to do the same things. Personally that reinforces the fact that we were meant for eachother.

 

I've always enjoyed Big Guy's marriage credo for men:

"You can be right or you can be happy."

:lol:

 

as my wife says...."happy wife, happy life".......simple, yet accurate....I usually just repond with Yes, dear......and all is well

"sometimes being right is the wrong answer" --ConfuciusKev :-k

 

I totally agree with pacman , the exciting ones usually turn into a nightmare . Alot of us have broken pickers . Bad desisions made with body parts other than our head . it took me three times to figure this out. Being married requires compromise.you have to become a student of what affirms your mate . if you master this you will reap incredible benefits .

 

So my wife and i have together for 17years married for 10. what makes our marrage work is we try and think of the other person b4 ourselves.

 

Been married for 22 years and together with the same person for 28 years, but I wouldn't try to offer too much unversal advice with all the different cultural, religious and personal sensibilities out there in the world today. Things kind of have to be evaluated on a case by case basis.