Okay everyone, let's hear your best 1 liners (exceeding the "1 line" rule is okay, so long as the joke doesn't totally suck). Why did the blonde get fired from the M & M factory? She threw out all of the W's.
Best Goldfish joke To goldfish are in their tank. One looks at the other and says "You man the guns and I'll drive."
A magician was driving down the road..then he turned into a drive way... Two peanuts walk into a bar..... One was a salted. What did the Ghost say to the Bee?? BOO BEE!!!
What's the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairy tale? A Northern fairy tail begins: "Once upon a time.." A Southern fairy tail begins: "Y'all aint gonna believe this shit.."
Hahaha, nice. Reminds me of this redneck one: Whats the last thing a redneck says before he dies? "Hey ya'll check this out!"
A guys´ wife is giving him hassle for drinking too much. She says "the next time you come home drunk, I´m leaving you. The next night the guy goes out and gets totaly shit-faced drunk and throws up all over him self. "Oh no" he exclaims to his friend, "my wife will kill me". His friend says "No no, just put a $50 bill in your top pocket and explain that someone threw up all over you and gave you the 50 bucks for the cleaning bill" The man goes home to his wife and explains the situation. She reaches into his pocket and finds two $50 bills. "What´s this other $50 for?" she asks. The man replies "Oh, that´s from the guy who shat in my pants"
pirate walks into a bar. bartender "why do you have a steering mask stuck in your pants?" pirate "arrgh! its driving me nuts!"
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HUGH
What do you get when you line up six blonde's ear to ear???? A wind tunnel What do you call it whe a blonde blows into another blondes ear??? Data Transfer There is a cow walking down the street, it falls off the curb, what does the cow say???? Nothing idiots, Cows dont talk.
A West Virginian recently announced he'd discovered a new use for sheep. Wool. Did you know the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky? Anywhere else and it would've been called a teethbrush. What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? Hide-and-Seek World Champion, 1955.
If "CON" is the opposite of "PRO", what is the opposite of PROGRESS? The top three most psycho pick-up lines: 1) What's your favorite flavor of wood; 2) I bet your wondering why I have no nostrils; 3) Baby, you stole my heart....That's ok, I have two in the fridge at home.
