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STR Veteran
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[SIZE=1]Sam came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St.Peter said, "You died in your sleep, Sam." Sam was stunned. "I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back! St. Peter said, "I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken." Sam was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past. "So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?" "Not bad," replied Sam the hen, "but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!" "You're ovulating," explained the rooster. "Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before?" "Never," said Sam. "Well, just relax and let it happen," says the rooster. "It's no big deal." Sam did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! Sam was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy [SIZE=1] was overwhelming. As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife shout..... "Dammit, Sam! Wake up. You're shittin in the bed!" Happy Friday! ![]() [/SIZE][/SIZE]
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Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. |
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| post thanked by: |
allison (02-08-2008),
asian fury (02-08-2008),
cbHarping (02-08-2008),
J_Sims (02-08-2008),
Pain Freak (02-08-2008),
pitmang1 (02-09-2008),
Red Hot Sloth (02-08-2008),
Red Ryder (02-08-2008)
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#2 (permalink) |
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Peanut butta jelly
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gross!
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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? “Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body—but rather a skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, ‘Wow, what a ride!’ ” —anon. |
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